Danish Dynamite

EM-triumfen i 1992 er naturligvis det største, dansk fodbold har præsteret. Men jeg har samlet nogle andre højdepunkter fra nyere tid.

(I øvrigt har Dansk Boldspil-Union en glimrende søgebase på alle landskampe)

»En fullllldstænnndig vanvittig vinkel å' skyde fra, den dér!«

Fra dengang Laudrup kunne styre russerne (»han er altså ikk' mere end 20 år«), Lerby havde lov til at spille uden benskinner, og fodboldkommentatorer ― som her Svend Gehrs ― lød alvorlige. Det meste af tiden.

VM-kvalifikation i København, 5/6-85: Danmark-Sovjet 4:2 ― 1. halvleg


2. halvleg


Kortere sammendrag af begge halvlege, for de travle


»¡Estamos en México!«

VM-kvalifikation i Oslo, 16/10-85: Norge-Danmark 1:5 ― sammendrag


Antihelt Arnesen

Fra dengang enkelte hold stadig spillede fodbold i stedet for på resultattaktik (forklaring i det andet klips begyndelse), liberoer ikke var mere specialister end at de turde gå med frem, og enkelte spillere stadig viste sportsånd. Selv når det var for sent.

VM i Querétaro, 13/6-86: Danmark-Vesttyskland 2:0 ― sammendrag med langsomme gengivelser


Sammendrag med kommentarer før og efter


Uden kommentarer

OL-/ungdomslandsholdet kan også. Desværre rakte det ikke til kvalifikation pga. en slem skrivebordsfejl i Dansk Boldspil-Union.

OL-kvalifikation i Aalborg, 10/6-87: Danmark-Rumænien 8:0 ― Danmarks mål uden kommentarer


Syv mål af syv forskellige spillere

Nogle år senere blev Danmark europamester. Det tog noget længere tid, før grækerne præsterede det samme...

VM-kvalifikation i København, 17/5-89: Danmark-Grækenland 7:1 ― Danmarks mål


»Dinamarca estaba jugando su mejor partido internacional desde que ganar el campeonato europeo seis años antes...«

Piter Muler, Braian Laudrup, Ebe Sán y Tómas Élbe...

VM i Saint-Denis, 28/6-98: Nigeria-Danmark 1:4 ― Danmarks mål med kommentar på spansk


»Og der' mål. Der' kasse. Simpelthen.«

En mindre betydende, men ikke mindre flot og i øvrigt historisk sejr, som jeg faktisk havde glemt, over verdens bedst betalte spillere ― fra en tid med nærmest intetsigende kommentarer.

Træningskamp i København, 17/8-5: Danmark-England 4:1 ― Danmarks mål


»Ja'm det jo dejligt!«
»Ja, det tæller altsammen, jo!«

Endnu et bevis på, at held kommer, når man søger det. Selv fulgte jeg kampen på en portugisisk kafe i portugiserkvarteret, jeg bor i. Fadostemning. Fantastisk.

VM-kvalifikation i Lisboa, 10/9-8: Portugal-Danmark 2:3 ― de sidste 10 minutter uden klip


Indsatsen, resultatet og sejren i Portugal mindede mig om en kamp mod Belgien, som jeg derfor vil runde af med, selvom den kronologisk ligger allerførst...

EM i Strasbourg, 19/6-84: Danmark-Belgien 3:2 ― målene, med engelsk kommentar


We are red, we are white
We're still Danish Dynamite!

From the Mexico Trip archive — Previously Unreleased

I could tell about all I the things I haven’t found time to blog.

About Andres, the Plazuela Bastida market clothes seller. Who liked my worn-out green jeans and asked me for a price. Of course I gave them to him, along with a bunch of T-shirts, a small towel and a pair of shoes, which I all had thought of leaving in the hotel anyway. In return, I got his address and a photo of him and his beautiful 3-year old daughter. Father of five, forty years old. Andres of Oaxaca.

About the book fair, local style. A poster with a reading grasshopper. A simple entrance portal. Stalls with stacks and shelves of books. Cubes for storage and for meeting rooms and relaxation, in straightforward red, yellow, blue and green. Paul Auster and Siri Somethingnordicsounding doing readings at the theatre, for the wannabeseens. Frankfurt go home. Why make it elaborate when you can make it simple. 28th Oaxaca Book Fair.

About the coffee place, called Xiguila, in the lovely neighbourhood Jalatlaco. Not just the organic coffee shop I thought it was but the best eatery I experienced in Oaxaca. Last meal there, best place. Xiguila in Jalatlaco.

About Dionisio, the artist, just next door to the coffee place. Sitting around his sand painting of skulls, a candle in each corner, and surrounded by skulls painted on the wall. Drinking mezcal and beer and eating typical Day Of The Dead food and drinking more mezcal and more beer. And admiring his art, the diversity of his artistic talent. Dionisio Martínez, artist, Jalatlaco.

About Etla. The parades of people in amazingly elaborate costumes, political or otherwise satirical statements, those clad in hundreds of mirrors, dancing on the plaza in front of San Agustín Etla’s church, then parading and dancing in people's gardens. All night. Dancing. Celebrating death. Etla, outside Oaxaca.

About folk metal. A genre mixing heavy metal with, well, folk. Got to know it from my roommate at the Reality Tour. Found out i already knew a group — Closterkeller singing in Polish ― playing that sort of thing, just didn’t know it was called like that. Dalriada, Eluveitie, Arkona. Folk metal.

About icebreaking. ‘Write up your best or worst or most hilarious travel experience in no more than 20 words, and then the others have to guess who wrote it’. And this, before anyone knew each other at the travel writers’ boot camp. My contribution, only one I could fit into twenty words:

18 bears catching salmon, grabbing into the water, waiting for them to jump, or stealing other bears’ catch. Katmai, Alaska.

Most thought the drinking stories or the Asia ones were me. It did break the ice.

About Monte Albán. A pre-Hispanic city. Its pyramids, its sacred places, its enormous squares, its ball games, its museum and souvenir shop. Finally a decent selection of postcards, and Frida Kahlo and Diego Rivera as paper dolls. Best of all, an answer to the question why the steps on the pyramids are so high when the inhabitants were so small ― explanation: Because the summit of the pyramids as a religious place had to demand an effort to reach. Whereas we, in our civilisation, try to think practical. I buy that. Monte Albán, and the lesser Mitla, archeological sites outside Oaxaca.

About weaving. Teotitlán del Valle, weavers’ village. A visit to José Buenaventura, weaver using natural dyes for all of his carpets and other works, except for purple and turquoise, which you cannot get from plants or insects like the other colours. Weavers’ village, Teotitlán outside Oaxaca.

New word: casanueces = nutcracker

Quote: ‘Del rayo te escaparás, pero de la raya no.’
(Recopilación de Elodia Miranda Santiago)

©2008/2011 Bjørn Clasen

Eins meiner Lieblingslogos

Das Logo der Kölner Zoo ist einfach genial. Beim ersten Blick einfach ein Elefant. Dann entdeckt man zwei weitere Tiere, die die Silhouette des Elefanten ausmachen — zusammen mit dem Wahrzeichen der Stadt Köln schlechthin, er Kölner Dom.

So einfach geht das. Genial. Einfach genial.

Gensyn med “Er DU Tintinolog?”

Nettet er ny nyttigt. Jeg har nu opdateret en milepæl fra min fortid — som er god reklame for, hvad jeg kunne (og stadig kan)…

Bogen kan i øvrigt stadig fås hos fx Faraos Cigarer i København. Og jeg signerer den gerne ved lejlighed.

What shall… we use… to fill… the empty… spaces…

That’s what Pink Floyd sang three decades ago on legendary ‘The Wall’.

Three years ago, I attended a statistics trade fair in Lisbon. One stand remained like this:

…kinda ironic when you see the name above. Looks like they really do need to populate Minnesota. Or maybe the representatives were so amazed by the Portuguese weather as opposed to cold Minnesota that they simply found better things to do, out in town.

Another stand, just as unfull, maybe remained like that for almost the opposite reason. Luxembourg is rich, at least in official GNP terms. So why bother manning a stand to study income? I mean, they know how to generate one. Or they didn’t particularly need to increase it, what with being rich and all.

Enough fair. Fair enough.

Huskedigt II

se Huskedigt I

Uden Titel
af Bjørn Clasen

Delaware
Nina, min ven i Laos’, to kroer
Penge på gulvet. Kaffe
Bacardi 2 Go
Slem hangover igen
Kopieres, smøres ud

Pia bryder isen
En minutafgørelse i reklamationsparlamentet
Need war, Peter?
Amøbe!
Wild cow!

Alarm! Strand — undergrund!
Åbn fløjteparaden!
Alpha 101
90125
Forsigtig hedning roser fjernsynet
Danmark, gå og gø

Meine FC-Wunschelf

‘Daaad, look! A man with short hair!’

‘Opera Comique’ — a comedy in English

BGT English Language Theatre

presents

OPERA COMIQUE

a comedy in English

by Nagle Jackson

Kulturhaus Mersch

Wednesday 5th October to Saturday 8th October at 20.00

Tickets €15.00 (€8.00 reduction)

Following the great success of “JANE EYRE” in 2010, the BGT is pleased to return to Mersch with “OPERA COMIQUE”, a hilarious comedy set at the premiere of Bizet’s “Carmen” in 1875.

A group of wealthy Parisians is visiting the Opera… but not for the show. Monsieur and Madame Corniche want their daughter, Viviane, to marry Hector Vigneron. But Viviane falls in love with Hector’s father …who is having an affair with her mother. Meanwhile “La Tartine” is trying to seduce the great composer Gounod. And amid all this, Bizet is in despair at the poor reception of his new work. “Carmen” may be a tale of passion, sex and betrayal …but it’s nothing compared to what is happening in the audience!

Actors: Phoebe Smith, Bjørn Clasen, Steven Anderson, June Lowery, Lindsay Wegleitner, Joachim Cour, Pierre-Yves Lanneau Saint- Leger, Ariane Spicq, Robin Edds and Patrick Schomaker

Design: Karl Pierce
Producer: June Lowery
Director: Tony Kingston

Advanzia MasterCard: Verwirrung Total

Sehr geehrter Kundendienst

Ich habe gerade telefonisch einen SecureCode angefragt und per E-Mail dann auch sofort erhalten. Ich wollte sie dann aktivieren, damit sie nicht abläuft:

auf der Seite http://www.advanzia.com/index.php?id=49 klicke ich auf "hier registrieren"

ich komme dann zur Seite https://enrollment.securecode.com/vpas/advanzia/enroll/index.jsp?locale=de_DE&bankid=121, wo ich dann auf "Jetzt anmelden" klicke

um auf NOCH eine Seite zu landen, nämlich https://enrollment.securecode.com/vpas/advanzia/enroll/reg.jsp?locale=de_DE&bankid=121, wo ich dann zum dritten Mal einen Registrierungs-/Anmeldungsknopf klicken muss, diesmal mit dem Namen "Registrieren"

wenn ich das tue, kommt allerdings dieselbe Seite, https://enrollment.securecode.com/vpas/advanzia/enroll/reg.jsp?locale=de_DE&bankid=121, wieder. Also eine Ewigkeitslücke.

Noch ‘was: In Ihrem E-Mail ist service@gebuhrenfrei.com als Ihre Adresse angegeben. Wenn man an diese schreibt, heisst es im Adressenfeld allerdings “Bitte nicht antworten”.

Es ist sehr verwirrend, und ich habe jetzt eine Stunde gebraucht, ohne meinen Internetkauf überhaupt ausführen zu können. Da frage ich mich zweierlei:

1) Wozu habe ich überhaupt eine Kreditkarte, wenn es so umständlich/unverständlich ist, sie zu benutzen

2) Wie kann ich Ihnen als Kommunikationsexperte helfen, Ihren Kundendienst zu verbessern, damit Ihre Kunden auch bleiben, und Ihnen weiterempfehlen?

Mit freundlichen Grüßen
Bjørn Clasen
Career, Creativity & Communication Coach
Clasen Coaching & Consulting

Brief an Nena

Hallo Nena

Aus Liebe zu deiner Musik, und da wir wissen, wie du Kinder liebst, möchten wir dieses Tolle Foto mit dir teilen.

Seit nunmehr fünf Jahren ist es für uns Tradition mindestens einmal im Jahr zu ein Nena-Konzert zu fahren, am liebsten Open Air. Dabei wohnen wir in unterschiedlichen Ecken außerhalb Deutschlands und machen uns immer die Mühe, eine Stadt zu finden, wozu wir alle recht einfach reisen können ...und wo du auch auftretest. “Wir” sind übrigens Steen aus Jütland in Dänemark, sein Sohn Kristoffer aus Kopenhagen und Bruder bzw. Onkel Bjørn, der in Luxemburg wohnt.

Da Steen schon als Teenie großer Nena-Fan war ist auch Bjørn mit dieser Musik aufgewachsen, und die Begeisterung ist jetzt in der nächsten Generation weitergeführt, indem Kristoffer als heutiger Teenie lieber Nena hört (obwohl er nur wenig Deutsch spricht) als all dem, was seine Gleichaltrigen sonst hören.

Wenn immer es möglich ist sind auch Steens Frau Merian und deren vier kleinen Töchter Mynte (4 Jahre), Merle & Nælde (beide 2) und Cirkel (6 Monate) bei den Konzerten dabei. Da das in diesem Jahr in Bad Segeberg nicht der Fall war, hat Papi aber Nena-Mützen und Nena-T-shirts für alle besorgt. Auf dem Foto sind es von links nach rechts Merle, Mynte, Cirkel und Nælde. Vielleicht schaffen wir es ja im Sommer noch einmal zu ein Konzert zu fahren, alle gemeinsam, damit der Nachwuchs auch Live ihre Begeisterung zeigen kann.

Die allerliebsten Grüße
Familie Clasen

Ståles nye klub — lidt om 1. FC Kölns spillere

Frits Adler fra sporten.dk har skrevet en artikel om 1. FC Köln — en udmærket minianalyse af nogle af holdets førstevalg blandt spillerne. Bortset fra, at de polske landsholdsspillere Adam Matuschyk og Sławomir Peszko end ikke er nævnt, var der et par smuttere, som jeg fik Adler til at rette.

Adler skrev oprindelig, at klubben skal forstærke sig på målmandspladsen. Men faktisk er Kölns Michael Rensing ifølge kicker forårets bedste målmand i Bundesligaen, og den bedste spiller i det hele taget, der ikke spiller for mestrene fra Dortmund. Desuden ejer 1. FC Köln stortalentet Michael Kessler. I denne sæson var han udlejet til FC St. Pauli og vil sikkert igen blive lejet ud til en anden klub, idet han fortjener spilletid.

Af profiler kan også nævnes den portugisiske tidligere stjerne Petit; en af Bundesligaens allerbedste forsvarsspillere, brasilianeren Geromel; og ikke mindst Milivoje Novakovič, som blev nummer tre på ligaens topscorerliste i år. Måske ikke verdensstjerner, men helt klart profiler. Adler skrev dog, at der ikke er mange profiler ud over Podolski, hvorfor jeg ikke ville klandre ham for dèn.

Endvidere hed det, at »Flere af de største tyske landsholdsspillere — herunder også flere danske — har spillet for Gedebukkene, der er klubbens kælenavn.« Sætningen var vist ikke helt korrekt (tyske landsholdsspillere, herunder danske…) — men derudover har store navne som Klaus Fischer og Rainer Bonhof og ikke-tyskere som fx Tony Woodcock og Toni Polster, for nu at nævne nogle ganske få, også spillet for Gedebukkene. Adler valgte helt at tage dette ud i anden udgave af sin artikel.

Sidst men ikke mindst glemte jeg at gøre ham opmærksom på, at Brečko bestemt ikke erpublikumsyndling. Personligt har jeg altid syntes rigtig godt om Brečko — jeg har endda hans træningstrøje fra for et par år siden — men han er den spiller, der oftest kritiseres, når jeg taler med andre 1. FC Köln-fans. Så generelt er han ikke så populær. Publikumskæledæggerne er Geromel og naturligvis Podolski og nu også Rensing.

Men rart, at der findes journalister, der tager konstruktiv kritik til sig. Og retter op. Tak til Frits Adler.

Jeg tænker i øvrigt på at kontakte Ståle Solbakken, hvis nu coachen har brug for en personlig coach. Han får i hvert fald sin sag for i Köln, både inden for klubbens mure og med omgivelserne i mediebyen. Jeg glæder mig virkelig til at se, hvad der kommer ud af det. Forhåbentlig først og fremmest stabilitet, og på lidt længere sigt étcifrede placeringer i slutstillingen.

Mer stonn zo dir, FC Kölle!!

Bjørn Clasen

Un faux chemin vers le mauvais but

« Le rêve d’indépendance financière est toujours très répandu dans les pays industrialisés. Voilà pourquoi nous nous échinons toute la journée et passons le plus clair de notre temps à travailler, alors que la plupart d’entre nous n’arriveront jamais à être vraiment « libres ». L’argent et le prestige occupent les deux plus hautes marches de notre système personnel de valeurs, avant même la famille et les amis. C’est d’autant plus étonnant que l’échelle de valeurs des économistes du bonheur est exactement l’inverse. Selon cette évaluation, il n’y a rien qui rende plus heureux que les relations interpersonnelles, c’est-à-dire les échanges avec sa famille, son ou sa partenaire, ses enfants et ses amis. En deuxième position vient le sentiment d’être utile ; puis, selon les circonstances, arrivent la santé et la liberté. Si l’on se fie donc à cette échelle de valeurs, on peut dire que la plupart des gens des pays riches se trompent en accordant autant d’importance à l’argent : ils ne font que prendre de mauvaises décisions. Ils cherchent à atteindre une sécurité qu’ils n’auront sans doute jamais. Ils sacrifient leur liberté et leur autonomie pour un salaire toujours plus élevé. Et ils achètent des choses dont ils n’ont pas besoin pour impressionner des gens qu’ils n’aiment pas avec de l’argent qu’ils n’ont pas. »

Richard David Precht
Dans l’essai « Vanuatu — les îles de la félicité. Qu’est-ce qu’une vie heureuse ? »

The European Union is not attractive

‘The European Union has somehow lost its sex appeal. There is no clear direction, and that is a problem […]. The current President, Barroso, is a bureaucrat; nobody knows the others in the European Union top.’

Jacek Kochanowicz, professor at the University of Warsaw
in Berlingske Tidende, 6 April 2011: ‘Let forkølelse i Polen’ by Michael Kuttner
(quotation translated from Danish to English by Bjørn Clasen)

Fjæsbogslogik

Little-known bands, Part VII:

Mango Mache

Beloved 'Mama of soul', born around 79 in the poor outskirts of Forquanesian (ERO) as Bisou Mukelele Machéba. After a troubled childhood and youth, during which she lived on the street most of the time, she started to become the symbol for those struggling for their existence in the unfavoured neighborhoods of Forquanesian, by singing with different soul folk groups in cafés and clubs from a mature age.

As this suburban music style became popular with a wider audience both geographically and in terms of society class, she was considered a pioneer, and her amazing and powerful voice soon echoed from radios all over Central Alouang.

Without ever having aimed for it, she suddenly began earning even very good money. Donating a major part of it to the groups of people sharing her background, Mango Mache has never left her roots behind. While frequenting parts of the intellectuals' higher layers, she still lives in a suburb of Forquanesian.

In recent years, Mango Mache has not only given concerts but also recorded with a wide range of musicians known from other genres.

Muzicq

Fusion project from Forquanesian (ERO), combining most everything from jazz and funk via classical elements to pop and new wave, and consisting of sometimes up to 30 musicians and singers.

As forerunners for this kind of musical collective, where the values are peace, love and no drugs, Muzicq gained enormous popularity in Alouang and beyond already with their first release, their self-titled EP from 32. Especially the songs Zabou Et La Détente [Zabou And Relaxation] and Danse Vers La Lumière [Dance Towards The Light] got a whole lot of airplay and were both included in new, more profesionally recorded versions on the full album Écoute [Listen], released the year after.

Currently Muzicq are working on a new album sung in Savanese, incorporating musicians playing traditional instruments as well as tribe singers from Southwestern Alouang.

The Porridgeheads

Speedrock band formed in Westwimpton (LTL). With what one music critic called 'melodic noise', this band of wild youngsters gained cult status.

Though The Porridgeheads released no less than five regular studio albums in just three years, its lineup changed constantly ― the band has been everything from a quartet to a septet, with keyboarder and occasional singer Mark Boling and bass player Rich(ard) Coolman being the only ones featuring on all albums.

The debut Green Porridge was released in May 32 and was followed by White Porridge only four(!) months later. May 33 saw the release of Pink Porridge, a surprising experiment with strong psychedelic influences, just as courageously remixed on Pink Pudding, released two months later.

The changing band members' obvious alcohol and drug abuse ― on a couple of recordings, assumed rhythm guitar player Sandy Sawker is credited with doing nothing but 'providing and utilising dope' ― laid The Porridgeheads still for a while before they suddenly re-emerged on what became their biggest success: Red Porridge, which hit the stores in June 34 and was followed up by the Xmas release of a highly-praised live album, Served With Sugar.

Whether the success or the drugs was the main factor will remain subject for discussion, but the band completely flopped musically and commercially on the March 35 release Black Porridge. Trying to compensate for the cult rockers' fading status, their record company released a B side collection titled Pooridge, which sarcastically did not do the trick, and The Porridgeheads officially dissolved in August the same year, although in reality it had happened months before. One last breath was the Xmas release of Headful Of Porridge, a 'best of' compilation.

Little-known bands, Part VI:

Jesus Barnet

Singer-songwriter from South Bollonam (COC), mainly known for his political lyrics questioning modern society. His 28 debut A White Scream In A Dark Room was highly praised by indie reviewers but did not sell particularly well, as Barnet refused to distribute it via a big company when offered to. Barnet is known for working concentrated, and following his debut he was very studio-productive even though he spent a lot of time on the road.

In 29, he released Oh Sewage, followed by Cement Lawn (30) and Jesus Barnet Plays Live (31). The fans then had to wait three years before he sent out what he himself described as his ultimate achievement, the double album This Minute's Mantra. Controversially, Barnet insisted on using fragile newsprint as paper for the CD booklet in order to show how perishable today's music is.

Défense d’afficher

This rock quartet from Rhauvain (ARN) of course took its name from the numerous wall signs saying 'post no bills'. What started out as an unambitious leisure project ― the band members themselves not really believing it when an agent came backstage after a gig at a high school, offering a record deal ― would turn out to be a surprising turn in the four blokes' lives.

The debut album ended up simply being called L'album (released 30), following disputes on the title between band members and record company people. Apart from the name, Défense d'afficher saw the recording as a one-time experience and did still not take it too seriously. L'album did not sell particularly well either, and so much bigger was their surprise when they were offered a deal for three more albums.

This time, there were no disagreements on the name; the 32 release was called Ça devient sérieux [It's Getting Serious]. One can nearly hear the nervousness lurking just beneath the surface compared to the unimpressed straight-forwardness of the first album, and commercially it did more or less similarly.

The band now decided to take a break, though with the aim of fulfilling the remainder of the record deal and then get on with their lives. During his 34 summer vacation, the drummer had a stroke of creativity and wrote a song called De Toute Façon [translates as something like 'Anyway']. It was a simple, nearly banal earcatcher of a rock song, and he persuaded the other band members to record it as a single in order to kick off Défense d'afficher's return to the studio.

Released for the Xmas sales, De Toute Façon surprisingly became a radio hit overnight, only to become the bestselling Arn single ever!

The sudden boost of encouragement caused by this unexpected success resulted in a fast but efficient recording of the quartet's most mature and harmonic album, carrying the same title as the smash hit and released in 35. The band having only put together six other songs of their own, De Toute Façon contains no less than three cover versions.

Pink Dawn

Funky rock trio from Käpumman: Selma Öyring (lead vox and guitar), Aske Olsson (guitar) and Severin-Otto Yrkman (keyboards and percussion).

Implementing its own style, mixing funk, acid jazz and sometimes ethno elements into a rock base, Pink Dawn was among the first bands from the independent scene to be put on the more commercial record shops' shelves as well. The debut album Pink Dawn from 23 thus sold well in both 'camps', and the band, supplied by a bass player and a drummer, became a hit at mainly rock festivals but also at alternative jazz events.

The 25 single Good Day Mr Faraway landed a surprising success because of its B side Fool Me, which was not even featured on the album that followed, titled Vulgar. After touring most of the world for 1½ years, band members were exhausted and eventually split up. While Öyring took on a never very successful solo career, Olsson quit the music business to concentrate on his family and take on a 'civil' job. Yrkman became a producer and guest musician, mainly in the independent part of the house scene.

Little-known bands, Part V:

Archery Contest

Rock band from Birliont (KRA) fronted by the bespectacled intellectual Maurice D'Entracte. The songs were in English, which might be part of the reason why Archery Contest never became superstars in their own country. However, the remarkable concept album And How Do I Water The Flowers?, released in 29, harvested critics' acclaim even in faraway corners of the world. It quotes large parts of the kloish philosopher Nikolaj Salgod's work Hvis Livet Er En Vase [If Live Is A Vase].

Bushbone

Pop band from Wimpton (WEV) whose first single She Is Earth, She Is Sky, She Is Ice, She Is Soul went straight to number 1 on the Miseira charts. This ballad of the classic kind is now followed by the more dynamic (but still classic) 40 Ways, released with Bushbone's self-titled debut album.

The Inches

Quartet from Buenos Caire (MÕE) with a style bringing together poprock, hardrock and the occasional touch of electrojazz. The four blokes aged between 20 and 23 formed at the conservatory of São Vicente and got almost immediate attention from not only local but also international agents.

The debut single 1000 released in the spring of 35 rocketed into the hit lists in most of Miseira and the album that followed, titled One Thousand, is one of the 50 most sold albums this year. It will be interesting to follow the band's development and success in the future.

Little-known bands, Part IV:

Fette Farben

Indie-rock band from Ralbjerg (RAL). Despite its name, which makes fun of the Baring language, the band is known for serious lyrics about society's outsiders, melancholic state of life, and mostly unhappy love. Fette Farben has become a well-known name in the gig world of most of the Nexboean-speaking parts of Nexdomtaso, yet remains without a record contract. That is why the band released the self-financed 8-track album Schwarz in 5000 copies in November 34, together with the promotional single Nete Fra Nordbyen.

The Ground

Quartet from Mock Quisbee (LAR) whose slow, at times almost silent indiepop-style songs were often based on social questions. The best known example is the cult classic Anonymous Android (from the third album Waiver) whose lyrics about alienation in a materialistic society are reputed to be the most-quoted on Larnese wall graffittis.

The Ground was formed in 23 by university dropout Phileas Noice (vox and bass) and two of his former university mates, Peter Hamilton (guitar) and Rüdiger Althmann (keyboards), the latter being an exchange student from Innstadt (BAL). Norbert Wick, originally from Overwind (LAR), soon joined on drums. The debut album Fragments Of Outer Life was released in October 23 and highly praised by indie critics but never sold very well. Gone Jigging from March 25 didn't do much better but gave the band enough material to tour for nearly two years, mostly to universities and underground clubs around the Chanalian Islands.

Waiver, partly recorded during the tour, was not finalised and released until December 30. An everything but streamlined ragbag of rough recordings on one side and more polished arrangements than on the former albums on the other side, this 23-song double album became the band's biggest commercial success, not least because of Anonymous Android. One reason for the long production time of the album was that Althmann tragically died in an accident in January 28. The keyboards and synths were taken over first by by Eastwimpton music conservatory graduate Michael Sothburn and later by a childhood friend of Wick's, Mickey Winder.

The Ground's last album ― and only the fourth in 12 years ― entitled Tales Of Metropolitan Wisdom was released in June 35.

Posh Hippies

Rock band from Fredericaville (VMI), formed and lead by singer, guitarist and keyboarder Julian Evermore (real name Julian Madison, born 10 in Fredericaville as the son of a mostly unemployed blacksmith and a committed mother who earned a living for her alcoholic husband and seven children by hard work of different kinds).

Julian had always been fond of music and got his first guitar from a junkyard at the age of 8. A 16-year old cousin gave Julian guitar lessons in return for carrying light drugs for him. A highly creative mind, Julian seemed to never notice that he was marginalised both by teachers and pupils at school. He set up theatre plays but was eventually thrown out of secondary school because he caused a scandal in front of parents as a play he had written and directed turned out to be lewd.

After a few years of taking on occasional jobs to help his mother, he got in touch with a Fredericaville pub owner, formed a 5-piece band almost overnight, and gave a gig of crazy and mostly improvised songs. This was in early spring 32. The producer Mick Farnell from the growing Be At Ease label happened to be in the pub that night. Rumours say he was drunk but he did sign a contract with the band... that in fact had no name. Evermore came up with 'Posh Hippies', inspired by an ad in which the words 'hush puppies' were used.

Only two months later, the weird but joyfully melodical poprock album In A World Of Green was released. It became one of that year's biggest commercial successes but Evermore and his everchanging band members never got a lot of money out of it, as Farnell took the biggest share, especially from the revenues on other continents. For example, the only single Hayadoo became a summer plague in parts of Nexdomtaso, and the concerts that Farnell arranged for the band to give at festivals there turned out to be a bad deal financially for the Posh Hippies.

After one such concert, the band split, or rather Julian Evermore sent the others back to Fredericaville, leaving two concert commitments unfulfilled. His current whereabouts are not known.

For et tæt nordisk samarbejde

»Frimandsætter, ranke, høje,
Sol og Blæst i Haar,
Kraft i Haand og Lys i Øje,
fylker Nordens Gaard«

Kaj Munk
“Saml Dig, Nord!” — Nationaltidende 10. juli 1938

Little-known bands, Part III:

Curfew At Five

Electronica duo from Eastwimpton (LAR) ― Sammy (Samuel) Jockbird on vox and synths and Pete Barnett on synths. The debut album They Came From East, released in 32, already sold well on the emerging electronica scene. But it was the smash hit Piece Of Mind (yes, 'Piece', not 'Peace') from the 34 album bearing the same title that wrote Curfew At Five into the history books. That song remains a dancehall favourite.

Selfish Shellfish

Tractor or rather trawler rockabilly band from Fesøyer (RAL). Nearly a fixed ingredient on festival posters in Ralbjerg and Eigaland with their outrageous energy on stage and ability to get a crowd rocking and rolling. At the same time, Selfish Shellfish manages to release an album nearly every year, the first three or four being heavily helped financially by Fesøyer's patriotic cultural foundation, despite the fact that only few of the septet's songs are in the Fesøyer language.

Sérieux s'abstenir

Rock group from Qoullux (QLX) ― Jean-Vincent Carteboulière (percussion), Hugues Chabrel (keyboard), Jonatan Hurgues (lead guitar), Yvon Lemaire (bass) and Fernand Valavat (vox and rhythm guitar). The name Sérieux s'abstenir [Serious People Should Refrain] is a joke on the words 'Curieux s'abstenir' [Curious People Should Refrain], which often appear at the end of real estate adverts in order not to get calls from persons who are just curious.

However, the band's biggest hits are mainly more serious and often subtly romantic ballads, such as Peintures de Marilène [Paintings Of Marilène], Rendez-vous hi-fi, Anges de classe [Classy Angels], Soudain, la vie... [Suddenly Life Will...], Roses or Une entité fragile [A Fragile Entity] ― but many will remember the rocker with the parodic lyrics Sarah, je bande [Sarah, I Have An Erection] too.

The band split in 30 after thirteen years and ten albums (not including a live and a greatest hits) but reformed in September 35 to give a concert in Qoullux' Auditorium. The concert was reported sold out an hour after presales started. This success combined with the announcement that a DVD containing the concert and a documentary on the band will be released for Xmas has started speculations whether Sérieux s'abstenir will go on tour again and maybe even record a new album.

Når inspirationen lever

»Jeg er stolt og meget glad for at “Kald det kærlighed” stadig er så livskraftig, som den er.
Jeg vil ydmygt sige tusind tak til inspirationen: Hun åndede på mig den nat i 1985, hvor sangen kom til sig selv. Før blækket var tørt var “Kald det kærlighed” kravlet ned af køkkenbordet og ud af kattelemmen i bagdøren. Først langt senere opdagede jeg, at den var forsvundet ud i natten for at leve sit helt eget liv i Danmark.«

Lars Lilholt
KODA Nyt 2008

Little-known bands, Part II:

Quite Polite

Ska rock band from Lack Quisbee (LTL). Originally known as Cream On The Floor, under which name the band released one (self-titled) album in 29, Quite Polite has somewhat revived the ska wave that peaked twenty years before. The breakthrough album Madam, released in 31, featured the provocative hit single (Fuck You) Madam as well as the instrumental town festival plague Ska It Up.

Due to quarrels within the band, causing members to quit only to join again, the follow-up album Superhero Social Counsellor was not released until 35. Surprisingly, it shows a matured and more guitar-dominated rock style.

u.degl.

Techno pop trio from Zwe (BUC): Rüdiger Fischfanger (vox and synths), Helmut Schönbrunn (synths and the occasional orchestral instrument) and Max Heber (synth percussions).

Landed a big dancefloor hit in 33 with Hantadorf Blues from the album Solange Vorrat Reicht, which for many redefined the techno scene. The band name is an abbreviation of 'und dergleichen', meaning 'and similar'.

Vic Moon

Self-proclaimed and self-ironising pop god born in Blona (ROJ) as Viktor Kesal but fled to Käpumman with his family when he was six. Originally part of the band Midday Dream, which had a lonely hit with So Lonely, So Slow back in 18, He plays such diverse instruments as guitar, synthesizer, harmonica, or harp, but it is mainly his voice that deserves critial acclaim.

Vic Moon's first albums all have titles as if they were compilations and are thus easily mixed up: Best Of Vic Moon (debut, 19), The Very Best Of Vic Moon (21), All The Best Of Vic Moon (24), Vic Moon's Greatest Hits (27), Vic Moon's Greatest (29), Vic Moon's Best Live (30)... before he suddenly chose the completely different title Blue Sky (32)... maybe because that same year his real best of album ironically entitled Greatest Tits was released.

Kun knapheden mangler

»Måske er det simpelt hen sådan her, livet ville være, hvis ikke døden fandtes. Hvis afslutningen på alting ikke konstant lå på lur i hver eneste handling og hviskede til én, at tiden er begrænset. Og at man derfor pinedød må nyde det, mens Jorden nærmer sig. Herinde i Second Life er der ikke knaphed på noget som helst. Ud over lige den ene ting, der giver det hele mening: knapheden selv.»

Nils Thorsen
fra artiklen “Sidste kapitel: Panik før lukketid” (Politiken 20/8-7)

Little-known bands, Part I:

File Not Found

'Old computer'-style electro trio consisting of the Baringers Heiko Tüsch and Günter Warnich and the Käp Anders Ölgren, all on synths and programming.

Already the self-titled 22 debut album featured two Top 50 singles: File Not Found and Digital Woman. The latter became a classic in electro music, and its beats and sounds have inspired or been used in many a song of the genre since. The second album was released in early 23 and bore the title 10 as this is the binary equivalent of '2'. It sold well too, critics saying this was mainly due to the success of the debut.

Before the band even started its tour to promote 10, Ölgren quit, officially due to family matters. After the tour, the band ironically moved its base and home studio from Baringers Stadt to Coast City, resulting in the entirely self-produced 25 release Numeric Boy featuring the moderately successful single Diamond Star. The inspiration of the new surroundings were obvious, yet the duo did not seem to have a real grip on their style. A fourth album kept being delayed, and meanwhile ― just before Xmas 27 ― a smaller local record company released Pixels, a compilation of File Not Found's favourite tracks according to themselves, as well as previously unreleased rare tracks and a few B sides.

The material for the 'real' album was never finished, and Tüsch and Warnich increasingly spent their time as DJs and in Tüsch's case also as a producer. It was not until 31 that the album Binary Breath came out. It contained none of the material recorded for the intended fourth album; instead Tüsch had profited from the contacts he had acquired as a producer, and the sound on Binary Breath was new and fresh. It became File Not Found's comeback as electro gurus, a.o. featuring the #2 single Microphonic, Part II.

Mildred & The Mildreds

Acid electro heavy metal quintet from Gollsea (WEV) consisting of four men and a woman... whose name is not Mildred but Jane Sowyer, and who is not the lead singer but the bass player.

The other band members are Phil(eas) McOak (lead vox and guitar), Virgil Spinton (vox and guitar), James Millick (synths) and Simon John (vox and percussions).

The first album Tempted By Pain, released in November 30, did not find a large public, being too trashily violent for even many heavy metal fans' taste. February 33 saw the release of the much more commercial Horrorscope, a.o. featuring a cover version of an old Strit Ut B-side, Come To Heaven. It became the best selling hardrock release of 33, and a follow-up is due later this year.

You Noisy Bastards

DJ duo — Chris Jenkinson and Bern Lovelord — formed in 28 under the name Jenbern. At the time Jenkinson was 16 and Lovelord 15, both attending Bullyhead Boarding School in the Larnese countryside.

Especially Jenkinson was expected to graduate with high marks and move on to law school. He did get high marks but he never even applied for law school. So widely known was the reputation of the two DJs, and so high was the self-confidence of Lovelord that he dropped out of Bullyhead before his final year, after having convinced Jenkinson to skip further studies and attempt a career as professional DJs, scratchers, samplers and eventually even music composers.

It is unclear when the name You Noisy Bastards came up — but at least there are no recordings under the old name. The duo released three self-produced and self-financed mini albums within 15 months in 31 and 32 before signing the highest debut record deal. Jenkinson and Lovelord insisted that their albums would also be released on vinyl, something extraordinary in those years.

The debut, ironically called Bullyhead was a commercial disappointment, and the record company wanted to buy the duo out of the second album in the contract. Again, it was Lovelord's amazing self-confidence and energy that talked the company into letting You Noisy Bastards use the studio for just three weeks, without paying producers etc., and release the second album after all.

The result was a far more dancehall style album of just 36 minutes. 6-Colour Heaven was soon to become a mega hit with DJs in most of the world.

hewlett-packard goes international

I just installed an hp scanner. A pretty long procedure. But the best is this message that showed up. It contains no less than four different languages, on one and the same screen! The window has a Danish frame with German instruction texts, and the ‘front’ message’s title and buttons are in English, with the essential written in Dutch.

Just to add even a little more spice, I live in Luxembourg and only had the choice of registering my scanner in French.

What really worries me though, is that those are exactly the six languages I speak on a decent conversation level. Is hp affiliated with the CIA or something? I just wanted to install a scanner…

A kinda wish list I guess

A not-too-expensive but reliable scanner

Jane Eyre photo book

A Victorian suit, maybe from Gentleman’s Emporium

tv•2: Showtime (CD)

Bret Easton Ellis: ‘Imperial Bedrooms’ and ‘Under Nul’ (books, in Danish)

Concert ticket for tv•2

Palle Schmidt: ‘Den Nye Generation — Dansk Møbeldesign 1990-2005’

A thingy that can record directly from cassette tapes to MP3 (something like this)

An iPhone, preferrably with at least 64 MB

A massage ‘subscription’

Harmonica lessons (for example Harmonica Academy, JP Allen, Harmonica Breeze.com or Lars Ringgaard: Lær At Spille Mundharpe)

Tickets to 1. FC Köln’s games (home and away) always welcome

En 8-årig om Afrika

»AFRIKA.

I afrika ligger landene: Madagaskar, Tunesien, Algeriet, Marokko, Libyrien, Ægypten, Mongritanien, Mali, Niger, Tchad, Soud, Ethiopien, Somal, og mange flere. Der gror: kaffe, kakao, tobak, majs, ris, oliven, bananer, rosiner, kokosnødder, citroner, og meget andet. Uden om det ligger søer, have, floder, o.s.v., de hedder: Alanterhavet, Middelhavet, Det Røde Hav, Indiske Hav, og andre. Det grænser til Saudi Arabien og ligger tæt på Europa og Asien, f.eks. Spanien ligger meget tæt på Marokko. Jeg kender kun to hoved-stader, det er: Alger og Tunis, Alger ligger i Algeriet og Tunis ligger i Tunesien.

skrevet af BJØRN CLASEN.«
den 11. februar 1981

Happiness

‘[T]here is no happiness like that of being loved by your fellow-creatures,
and feeling that your presence is an addition to their comfort.’
Charlotte Brontë
in ‘Jane Eyre’ (chapter 22)

Greenlandic rock

Find more artists like Arctic Spirits at Myspace Music

Ideas for next London trip

Stroll Portobello Market again

Join a guided tour of Wembley Stadium

Go to the theatre, possibly a fringe/off-West End one

…also, watch a play in Shakespeare’s Globe

Join a day trip to Stonehenge, Bath and maybe Windsor (plenty of providers, for example this one or:)

All I want for Xmas…

Charlotte Brontë's Jane Eyre adapted for the stage by June Lowery by Fotini Kaparelou | Make Your Own Book

Clasen Coaching & Consulting — the final ad

Click on the photo to see the ad in a higher resolution



So this is how it will look, the advertisement in the programme for the play ‘Jane Eyre’, which opens in Luxembourg next week.

A huge thank you to each and everyone of you who gave frank, insightful and useful feedback.

The draft ad certainly was subject of debate, both on this blog and on Facebook (not so much on LinkedIn though). It made for a highly interesting and self-reflective process. And I'd like to share some of the conclusions.

The picture

The photo used for the ad turned out to be somewhat controversial. Most agreed that it has a relaxed feel. Whether this is good or bad depends — as everything else — on the viewer. Criticism included ‘it looks like a tourist brochure’. And that I look like a dreamy (one even said ‘sleepy’) New Age hippie. The most creative comment was that I ought to look more assertive.

Other people — and I'll invite those to a party later on :) — really liked that it is ‘so me’. Not in the sense that I am a sleepily dreamy New Age hippie but that the picture expresses genuineness and ‘what you see is what you get’. In other words, it is honest — one of the virtues that characterises a good coach.

The more technical perfectionists also pointed out that the picture of me looks inserted and blurred/in low resolution. Not untrue either, as I faded the background in order for the text to be readable, and enlarged ‘me’.

The text

Most people liked the catchphrase ‘Find your horizons. Then reach them.’ and felt it went well with the photo.

On the other hand, the quote from ‘Jane Eyre’ and especially the sentence following it: ‘Today, he would have called his coach.’ led to confusion. On Facebook I had not explained the context — basic mistake.

As the ad will appear only in the aforementioned theatre programme, those who see it will know what the quote means. If they pay attention to the play, that is :). Otherwise I would not have used that quote, or at least not the concluding sentence ‘Today, he would have called his coach.’

The very useful technical suggestions included: ‘clarify that you're a life coach’, ‘make the word 'coach' more visible’, ‘link the quote to the 'Today…' sentence by using the same font’, and ‘eliminate the full stops, 'cause that's German’…

There were also a few who did not think the text was sufficiently visible and suggested I change colours. Others loved the colour scheme.

Changes

So what did I choose to change? Well, first of all, I chose to keep the photo. It is true that the confusion argued by some was mainly due to the ‘Jane Eyre’ quote and the horizon thing coming from two different idea worlds, as a professionel Graphic Artist and former colleague pointed out.

As 1) my hair colour is different these days because of the play, 2) I am not photogenic on portraits especially (yes, I did try), and 3) I did not have instant access to a good camera, it turned out not to be an option to change the portrait within this short deadline.

Then I could have left out the photo altogether, skipped the horizon part (including catchphrase) and used just the ‘Jane Eyre’ reference. But a photo does catch people's attention much more than words, plus this particular photo provides a surprising contrast inside a theatre programme. So people will notice. Criterion number one — check.

Conclusion: I used the same photo but with me in the original size, meaning smaller than in the draft (thank you, Frederik!).

Textwise, I added ‘Life and Career Coach’ (thank you, Pierre-Yves) and also chose to centre my contact details. After a lot of moving around, deleting, re-inserting, re-moving around and changing and re-changing colours between my logo's green and blue and the nature-brown from the photo, I finally ended up keeping both the catchphrase, the quote (never thought of removing it for this particular ad) and the ‘Today…’ sentence. But —

— I emphasised the quote, making it more of the eyecatcher. In order to clarify and link it to ‘Today, he would have called his coach’, I also added the first name of the character who says the quote, and I changed ‘Today…’ to the same font. Except for the word ‘coach’, which I (thanks, Maruška) emphasised by leaving it in the same font as the (now former) catchphrase and my contact details.

This and the added ellipsis (‘…’) should link it directly to ‘Find your horizons. Then reach them.’, which I instead moved down right before my contact details as a kind of slogan (and therefore had to keep the full stops as it is now on one line). I could have left out this phrase but then — again — I should leave out the photo too, and most people did like the slogan. Which is why I will probably use it in future ads, maybe as a real catchphrase like in the draft, and might therefore as well use it in my first ad. So people will recognise. Criterion number two — check.

Like it or not. Bad ads are better than indifferent ones. And this one certainly did not leave anyone indifferent. Criterion number three — check.

So it won't be the last time I encourage you to contribute with your criticisms, your ideas …and your praise. I appreciated it, all of it. Thanks again! Spread the word!! And do come see ‘Jane Eyre’, so you will know when Edward Rochester says those famous words.

Bjørn Clasen
Clasen Coaching & Consulting

Clasen Coaching & Consulting — draft ad

Click on the picture for a better resolution.



Tell me what you think of the ad!
Post a comment below — choose one adjective that you think describes it, and one verb telling me how the ad could be better.

And just be honest — no ‘niceness’ just in order to be nice :)

I appreciate your feedback!!



©2010 Bjørn Clasen

Mørkets manglende gråd

»Disse øjeblikke, der forbandt natten med daggryet, var lange og mørke. Hvis bare jeg havde kunnet græde, havde alt været meget nemmere. Men hvad skulle jeg græde over? Hvem skulle jeg græde over? Jeg var alt for selvoptaget til at græde over andre og for gammel til at græde over mig selv.«
Haruki Murakami
i »Sønden For Grænsen Og Vesten For Solen«
(Mette Holms oversættelse fra japansk)

Great entrepreneurs are willing to be vulnerable

‘To embrace the misfit in oneself is to be vulnerable. It is to forsake the easy acceptance that comes with fitting in and to instead be fortified by a kind of love, really. A love of life, a love of wonder, and, ultimately, a sustaining love for oneself.’
Dan Pallotta
in his blogpost ‘Misfit Entrepreneurs’ on Harvard Business Review

The Trend Of Encouraging Overeducation

‘Even top-tier MBA degrees often say more about the desire to have an important credential
than about any greater capacity to be a good leader or manager.’
Michael Schrage
in ‘Higher Education Is Overrated; Skills Aren't’
on Harvard Business Review

Explore Your Landscape Of Life

‘Life isn’t a project to be completed; it is an unknowable landscape to be explored. A 24-year-old can’t sit down and define the purpose of life in the manner of a school exercise because she is not yet deep enough into the landscape to know herself or her purpose. That young person — or any person — can’t see into the future to know what wars, loves, diseases and chances may loom. She may know concepts, like parenthood or old age, but she doesn’t really understand their meanings until she is engaged in them.’
David Brooks
from ‘The Summoned Self’ — opinion in The New York Times

Navnedigt I

Tilegnet mestervrøvleren Halfdan Rasmussen.

Peter hedder Anders
og Børge hedder Bent.
Ole hedder Benny
men mangler lidt talent.
Freddy hedder Arne
og Bjarne er et snøvl.
At digte kræver ofte
at sig’ en masse vrøvl.

© Bjørn Clasen 2010

What Is Love?

It is about giving or at least wanting to give. Most can agree on that. And after that? Hoping to receive? Wanting to receive? Expecting to receive? Demanding to receive? This discussion is about just that.

It started when I posted a comment on the article ‘Neva A. Lockhart on why Unconditional Love is a Lie’. Ms Lockhart then wrote back to me:

‘To know what love looks and feel like one would have to have all or most of their expectations met. This gives a person the ability to identify for themselves what their true love is. It is unrealistic, and unreasonable to think that True Love has no expectations, when we love we expect to be loved in return, even our pets expect a loving pat on the head, should we as humans expect anything less?’

My thoughts on the matter are that I don't disagree with either of Ms Lockhart or Saint-Exupéry, or rather I don't fully agree with either of them.

I do not believe that, in loving, one expects something in return. One hopes for something in return. And one's readiness to love can be badly shaken if love is unrequited.

That, in turn, leads to shielding oneself against love without expectations …the question is then whether love with expectations, as opposed to love with 'just' the hope that is a part of the feeling of love almost by definition, is actually really love or more like admiration, affection, or perhaps affiliation.

Love is a feeling, it is not something you can create or destroy in yourself. As with all emotions, you either feel it or you don't. That is the purity of love. And in that respect, I believe that talking about 'unrealistic' and 'unreasonable' is imposing something on love that it cannot be fit into: sense (in the meaning of 'reason').

Love very often is not sensible, does not make any sense. Even when it does, it is not sense that has caused the feeling to be born or to persist. Likewise, it is not sense that makes the feeling of love disappear.

So when we love, we give. When we give, we hope for something to return. Some call it 'invest'. Unlike other kinds of investment, we do not expect anything in return. We hope, though it is not the hope that drives us, that drives the feeling. The feeling is just …there.

Bjørn Clasen

Nogle af det danske landsholds højdepunkter

For at varme lidt op til VM og troen på, at alt kan lade sig gøre, har jeg fundet nogle klip frem fra rød-hvide stjernestunder. Nyd dem. Og må vi få mere af den slags bold og grund til jubel i Sydafrika!























Vi blev for resten også europamestre engang…

Underholdende selv for uindviede:Anmeldelse af Dansk-Græsk Ordbog

Dansk-Græsk Ordbog
af Rolf Hesse, Patakis Publications, 2008
(distribueres i Danmark af Museum Tusculanums Forlag)

Af Caspar Curdt-Christiansen


Tilbage i begyndelsen af 1990’erne studerede jeg græsk, altså nygræsk (det skal man altid præcisere for lige netop dette sprogs vedkommende), og ét blandt mange problemer, man som græskstuderende havde at kæmpe med på den tid, var manglen på dansk-græske/græsk-danske ordbøger. Der fandtes ganske vist nogle rejseparlører og ordlister, der vel lige netop var tilstrækkelige til, at man kunne bestille en ouzo på en bar, men for ethvert behov, der lå ud over det allermest prosaiske, måtte man ty til f.eks. engelsk-græske/græsk-engelske ordbøger. Stor var således min glæde – og overraskelse – da en af mine studiekammerater en dag kom forbi min studenterhybel i Thessaloniki og stolt fremviste en rigtig dansk-nygræsk ordbog: Rolf Hesses Dansk-Nygræsk Ordbog (Munksgaard, 1995); 28 000 opslagsord og 20 000 faste udtryk!

Sidenhen, i 1998, kom der også en nygræsk-dansk ordbog til (som jeg i parentes bemærket selv har medvirket til), udgivet på det græske forlag Patakis – og det er selvsamme forlag, der står for udgivelsen af denne nye gennemreviderede udgave af Dansk-Nygræsk Ordbog, der til lejligheden er blevet omdøbt til ”Dansk-Græsk Ordbog” uden det præciserende ”ny-” nævnt ovenfor. Lad os håbe, det ikke giver anledning til alt for mange fejlindkøb blandt landets klassiske filologer ...

Hvad er så det nye i den nye udgave? Ved første øjekast ser man, at forlaget Patakis’ valg af papirkvalitet, indbinding og typografi er bevaret, og det er faktisk ikke dårligt. Sammenlignet med førsteudgaven fra Munksgaard giver den nye udgave et solidt indtryk; hvordan den ser ud efter fem års intensiv brug, vil tiden vise, men det virker, som om den er beregnet på at blive brugt. Samtidig har den en luftig typografi med øget kontrast, der gør teksten behagelig at læse, men som naturligvis også koster plads. Således er sidetallet forøget med ca. 20 %, om end formatet sågar er lidt større. At ordbogen er blevet større, bekræftes af Museum Tusculanums pressemeddelelse, hvori følgende står at læse:

”Efter at have været udsolgt i nogle år er Rolf Hesses Dansk-Græsk Ordbog nu udkommet i en gennemrevideret, forøget og illustreret udgave. Ordbogen indeholder ca. 30 000 opslagsord med mange brugseksempler og idiomatiske udtryk; desuden en græsk grammatik med en udførlig liste over uregelmæssige verber, geografiske navne m.v. Bogen henvender sig både til danskere og grækere.”

Gennemrevideret, forøget og illustreret: Lad os indledningsvis se på disse tre i omvendt rækkefølge.

Illustreret

Allerede i forbindelse med udgivelsen af nygræsk-dansk ordbog fik Rolf Hesse den glimrende idé at lade en række svært oversættelige ord illustrere, f.eks. kunne den danske bruger se nydelige små tegninger af en bouzouki, en ikonostase eller andre særligt græske fænomener fra musikkens, den græsk-ortodokse kirkes eller gastronomiens verden. I den nye græsk-danske ordbog gentages succes’en, og den græske bruger kan således få forklaret ved hjælp af en tegning, hvad en pølsevogn, en nisse eller en lur (altså musikinstrumentet) er. En fremragende idé, synes jeg; det er egentlig besynderligt, at denne fremgangsmåde ikke er mere udbredt inden for leksikografien.

Forøget

Ifølge forordet er der tilføjet over tusind nye opslagsord og mange nye udtryk (f.eks. inden for informationsteknologi og mobiltelefoni). Samtidig anføres det, at ”nogle forældede ord og indtryk er fjernet eller reduceret, f.eks. inden for telegrafi”.
Ord som mobiltelefon og modem var der i forvejen, mens sms, hjemmeside og harddisk er kommet til – i selskab med verberne downloade og uploade. Ordene cd og cd-rom er blevet tilføjet, men moderniseringen har ikke strakt sig til dvd og dvd-rom, hvilket ellers ville have været nærliggende. Man må også lede forgæves efter usb-nøgle, lydkort eller kortlæser. Til gengæld er de temmelig forældede diskettestation og fjernskriver bevaret.
Andre ord, som der ville være god mening i at have med i en ny og forøget ordbog, men som man må lede forgæves efter er andengenerationsindvandrer, miljøbevidst eller måske grønne afgifter.
En af de sværeste beslutninger, når man laver en ordbog, er som bekendt spørgsmålet om, hvilke ord der skal tages med. Muligvis har det anvendte korpus her ikke været det allermest moderne. På den anden side skal man selvfølgelig også passe på med at fylde en ordbog med alskens døgnfluer, der ryger ud af sproget, lige så hurtigt som de kom ind. Det kan måske forklare, at man skal lede længe efter deciderede slangudtryk i ordbogen. Dog er der en del moderne dagligsprog – hvis man skal udtrykke det diplomatisk – herunder en række af de ord, som angiveligt er de første, skoleelever slår op, når de får en ny ordbog i hånden. Jeg finder det udmærket, at man f.eks. også får den ”moderne” betydning af et ord som rimelig (betydning 3 herunder):

rimelig adj 1. λογικός (~e priser λογικές τιμές), εύλογος 2. (mild) επιεικής (‑ής ‑ές) (en ~ afgørelse μια επιεικής απόφαση) 3. (adv: temmelig) αρκετά· (meget) πολύ ...

Under opslaget fed får vi også at vide, at det i daglig tale kan betyde ”super” – oversat med φανταστικός – og slår man op under røv, får man fuldgode oversættelser af både rend mig i røven, de tog røven på mig og være på røven – så der er taget et vist hensyn til de allermest kurante udtryk af denne art.

Gennemrevideret

Endelig får vi at vide, at ordbogen er gennemrevideret. ”Gennemrevideret” betyder vel, at der dels er blevet luget ud i gamle og forældede udtryk – som nævnt ovenfor – dels at egentlige fejl er blevet rettet. Jeg har med glæde kunnet konstatere, at en af de grimme fejl fra første udgave er blevet rettet: I første udgave kunne man læse sig til, at en billion på græsk ganske rigtigt hedder τρισεκατομμύριο, og at en trillion angiveligt også hedder τρισεκατομμύριο. Denne klassiske oversætterfejl (der formodentlig stammer fra, at der er blevet brugt engelsk-græske ordbøger som ”mellemled”) er i den nye udgave blevet fjernet – ganske enkelt ved at opslagsordet trillion er blevet fjernet, hvilket i øvrigt må siges at være en ganske fornuftig løsning, da man næppe nogensinde får brug for at kunne oversætte så høje tal.

Andre fejl er til gengæld blevet overset. Under opslaget højhed står udtrykket Deres kongelige højhed oversat med η αυτού Υψηλότης, hvilket strengt taget betyder hans kongelige højhed.

Endvidere er der blevet rettet igennem for at tage højde for diverse retskrivningsændringer siden 1995 (en ret omfattende opgave, da Dansk Sprognævn som bekendt ændrer retskrivningen ustandselig). Om end dette ikke er en retskrivningsordbog, så har brugeren en berettiget formodning om, at en nyudgivet ordbog er i overensstemmelse med gældende retskrivning (noget som visse ordbøger ikke gør sig særlig umage med). Således er alle ord indeholdende ”linie” blevet ændret til ”linje”, og ”AIDS” og ”TV” er nu skrevet med lille; til gengæld er ”VVS-installatør” ikke blevet ændret til ”vvs-installatør”.
Det samme gør sig gældende for slåfejlene: Nogle er blevet rettet (f.eks. ινκόγνκιτο til ινκόγκνιτο), mens andre er blevet overset (f.eks. står der under opslagsordet personregister stadig ”folkreregister”). Denne slags slåfejl må vel anses for at høre hjemme i småtingsafdelingen, om end det kan undre, at de ikke er blevet fanget i en stavekontrol. Mere beskæmmende er det, at min arbejdsplads er stavet forkert, og at oversættelsen til græsk heller ikke er anført korrekt: Europaparlamentet staves Europa-Parlamentet, hvis det skal være helt rigtigt, og mens det græske Ευρωκοινοβούλιο måske nok kan findes i avissprog, så er den korrekte titel altså Ευρωπαϊκό Κοινοβούλιο.

Positive/negative punkter

Ud over selve ordbogen (og dens forord) indeholder bogen også en kort gennemgang af både det danske og græske sprogs historie og en kortfattet grammatik for begge sprogs vedkommende. Det kan naturligvis ikke træde i stedet for en egentlig grammatik, men det er fint, at man får det mest basale med her. Endvidere er der en vejledning til ordbogen, hvor man bl.a. får at vide, at de græske substantivers og adjektivers bøjning ikke angives, når de følger de almindelige bøjninger (for substantivernes vedkommende: maskulinum med endelsen -ς, femininum med endelsen -α eller -η, neutrum med endelsen -ι eller -ο; for adjektivernes vedkommende, når endelsen i de tre køn er -ος -η -ο). Dette er en udmærket pladsbesparende foranstaltning, da selv den mest utrænede bruger må formodes at kende de mest almindelige bøjninger. Imidlertid får man ikke altid femininumsformen at vide, selv når endelsen ikke er en af ovennævnte; dette er navnlig problematisk, når det gælder personbetegnelser, der har forskellig endelse afhængig af køn. F.eks. opslagsordet livsnyder:

livsnyder -en -e γλεντζές

Her får vi altså blot én oversættelse med den usædvanlige maskulinumsendelse -ες, men man bliver ladt i stikken, hvis man gerne vil omtale en kvindelig livsnyder. Dette kan især undre med tanke på, at Nygræsk-dansk ordbog under γλεντζές tilføjer (f: γλεντζού). For taxachauffør får vi også kun maskulinumsformen ταξιτζής (jeg har trods alt set kvindelige taxachauffører i Grækenland, om end de næppe er så talrige som de kvindelige livsnydere ...). For ord som læge eller parlamentsmedlem får vi dog også femininumsformerne, hhv. ιατρίνα og βουλευτίνα.

Det er sjældent, at ordbøger er decideret belærende, men en gang imellem er det faktisk på sin plads, og jeg er ganske begejstret over følgende opslag:

græskkatolsk
(romerskkatolsk med græsk ritus) ελληνοκαθολικός
(fejlagtigt for: græskortodoks) ελληνορθόδοξος

Således hjælpes både den bruger, der rent faktisk er interesseret i den korrekte oversættelse af ”græskkatolsk” (religiøst mindretal, der hovedsageligt findes på de ioniske øer), og den bruger, der egentlig mener ”græskortodoks”.
En yderligere forbedring kunne eventuelt være at tilføje en betydning 3 med slangudtrykket ”græskkatolsk” i betydningen ”ligeglad” ...

På samme vis advares man om falske venner, sådan som det f.eks. ses i opslaget gymnasium:

gymnasi|um -et -er λύκειο (NB! γυμνάσιο betyder skolen fra 7.-9. skoleår)

Et punkt, der kunne forbedres ud fra et leksikografisk synpunkt, er den manglende skelnen mellem oversættelse og forklaring. F.eks. ser opslaget peberkage ud, som følger:

peberkage -n -r είδος μπισκότου (το)

Det kunne foranledige en til at tro, at en peberkage på græsk hedder είδος μπισκότου, men faktisk betyder det blot ”slags småkage” og er således en forklaring snarere end en oversættelse. Her ville det være at foretrække at anføre forklaringer tydeligt, f.eks. med kantede parenteser eller ved at bruge kursiv.
I tilfældet kolonihave derimod får man ikke blot en tegning (med vimpel og det hele), men også en forklaring angivet med ”(kan gengives)”:

kolonihave -n -r (kan gengives) περιβολάκι με σπιτάκι μέσα σε οργανωμένο πάρκο

Her er man ikke i tvivl om, at det er et kulturspecifikt fænomen, der bliver forklaret snarere end egentlig oversat.

Andre lande- eller kulturspecifikke fænomener er forklaret eller præciseret på fyldestgørende vis. Opslaget højesteret ser f.eks. således ud:

højesteret -ten -ter ανώτατο δικαστήριο, τριτοβάθμιο δικαστήριο· (i GR) Άρειος Πάγος

Brugeren får derved to anvendelige oversættelser for ordet højesteret, som kan anvendes til at betegne den danske (eller en hvilken som helst anden ikke-græsk) højesteret, men får samtidig at vide, at den græske højesteret har bevaret den klassiske benævnelse Areopagos. På samme måde kan man under parlament læse sig til, at et parlament hedder κοινοβούλιο, men det græske parlament hedder βουλή. Sådan skal det gøres!

Som sagt henvender ordbogen sig ifølge forordet og Museum Tusculanums pressemeddelelse både til danskere og grækere, og jeg synes, at forfatteren har gjort sig umage med at gøre denne ordbog lige anvendelig for både danskere og grækere, for så vidt angår udvalget af opslagsord, fraser og sætninger. Der er således blevet plads til en del ord, jeg ville opfatte som temmelig gammeldags, og som den danske bruger næppe ville slå op under, men som den græske bruger vil kunne få brug for, f.eks. hvis man læser ældre litteratur. Man kan f.eks. slå op under ikke blot påberåbe sig, men også beråbe sig på. Ligeledes finder man ikke kun det almindelige sæbeskum, men også sæbelud (begge oversættes med σαπουνάδα).
Dog er der ét punkt, hvor grækeren har brug for hjælp, men ikke får den: udtalen af danske ord (der som bekendt kan være temmelig uforudsigelig). Forfatteren gør selv opmærksom på denne mangel i forordet og henviser græske brugere til danske udtaleordbøger (en kort liste er vedlagt).

Derudover synes jeg, det er værd at bide mærke i, at cypriotisk græsk ikke nævnes med et ord. Man er vant til, at man i engelsksprogede ordbøger får oplysninger om sproglige forskelle mellem i hvert fald britisk og amerikansk engelsk. Noget tilsvarende gør sig ikke gældende med cypriotisk græsk her. Man kan naturligvis hævde, at cypriotisk græsk blot er en dialekt, og at der ikke er plads i en bilingval ordbog til dialektale ord, og under alle omstændigheder er det skrevne sprog i Cypern så godt som identisk med det græsk, der skrives i Grækenland. På den anden side er der tale om det sprog, der tales af befolkningen i et selvstændigt land, så det ville måske være på sin plads for visse glosers vedkommende at tilføje, at man i Cypern anvender et andet ord. Ellers kunne man i det mindste skrive et par ord om cypriotisk græsk i forordet.


Alt i alt synes jeg, at en i forvejen god ordbog er blevet endnu bedre. Uanset om man er oversætter, studerende eller blot bor i udlændighed, kan man kun være taknemmelig over, at der mellem to så relativt små sprog findes en så omfattende og vellavet ordbog.


Caspar Curdt-Christiansen
Oversætter, Europa-Parlamentet, Luxembourg

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