The underdue final

Avoiding EURO 2016: A self-experiment — Day Twenty-Eight

Portugal and France will play out the final. This concludes my blogpost series on avoiding EURO 2016, three days before this finally last game, three days before expected. Which may indicate that the self-experiment has failed but at the same time actually proves its point.

The big circus will close for another couple of years. A lot of smaller ones will keep playing.

Meanwhile, enjoy the pleasures in life. Such as art, love, empathy and celery salad.

10 Days: 1:0 and 1:0

Avoiding EURO 2016: A self-experiment — Day Ten

We are on Day Ten of this year’s European football championships for national teams, played in France until 10 July, day of the final which I cannot watch anyway due to family commitments far more important than football.

We are on Day Ten on my self-experiment, the objective of which is to see if it is possible even for someone who does follow football regularly and is even lifetime member of the team he supports, to actually not follow what is supposed to be the climax of the season, even of the past couple of seasons.


We are on Day Ten, and the experiment is going well. Beyond expectations in fact. Two results is all I know for sure after ten days and thus probably twenty matches out of thirty-six in the group stage.

Those two results, are, even if hardly representative, symptomatic of one of my reasons not to bother following the tournament. Poland 1, Northern Ireland 0. Italy 1, Sweden 0. Two matches, two goals. Two teams that have not scored.

This, to me, is what the big tournaments have become. A struggle not to lose, more than a real attempt to win. Football is more about preventing defeat than about giving everything for victory. The three-point rule, introduced in England in 1981 and in most other places from 1994, has not changed that, on contrary. Especially in competitions with few matches in the group stage, it rather encourages defensive football especially from the supposedly weaker teams, instead of motivating them to go for gold.

As an 1. FC Köln supporter, you may say I am not one to get too loud about this, and I agree. Football has become so polarised that in most leagues, only a few big teams have a real possibility to finish at the top, leaving the others to do what they can to scrape together a point here, another one there, with the occasional three-pointer needed for survival, with the squad they have been able to trawl up from what remains after the big ones have vacuumed the player market every six months.

Nature, Our Mother

‘[N]ature is motherly, and [there is] no reason to improve or educate it, as it voluntarily gives everything [you] need.’
Carsten Jensen

Life’s Three Phases So Far

A beer, a dark one
Not very tasty, not very sophisticated
I let its fading foam foam on my tongue
And think about its fake complexity

It’s the opposite of my muse
Who is a puzzle, and a hard one too
Every time you think you’re almost done
A new piece shows up
Or the ones you have put together
Disassemble

What can I do to lighten her darkness
What can I do to sweeten her taste
Make her creativity erupt
Her words pour out
Again

I move on to youth with a cup of green tea

Fruit liqueur, apricot
I smell it, I sip it, I taste it
Immersing my mouth, blending with saliva
Wondering if I like it or not

Subtle or simple? Not sure
OK for a start, nauseating when it stays
It’s like overwhelming feelings
Except not worth it
Is it in, is it out, where is it all?
What is it all, how does it make me feel?
If at all —

— tell me, muse
How to taste it the right way
How to enjoy it for real
Or at least decide if I like it or not
This faky-fruity thing full of a flavour and a colour
That it should not have
Tell me
I might listen, I might even understand
Once

I let my youth be, swallowing it with some water

Then I grew up
And tasted the brandy
A special one, a rare one
A mature one, hidden away, only waiting
For me to taste and maybe savour

I waited for it, I hesitated
I put the glass back without trying
And went on with things
Thinking I could postpone maturity

I did so a few times
Taking the glass, putting it down
When I finally tried the brandy
It was strangely neutral
I was strangely numb
And perhaps mature
So I poured it out
After a sip or two
And went on with water
Went back to the source
Found myself
Found a place for my muse
And for myself

©2013

‘It's good to be me
 who else would I be.’
Bjørn Clasen

Highly recommended even if you don’t usually read poetry

A brand new release of an, in publishing terms, debuting young author:

Katie Hall — ‘Scribbling’

Katie Hall’s poems are of the rare kind that pierce right into your soul, leaving a tingling feeling under your skin, matched only by the speechless silence enveloping the roaring storms in your mind. In other words: They touch you. Not as soapy pathos — on contrary, they touch your deepest, poorly-lit spots because they are so real and relevant. No matter if you have lived situations similar to what the poems get into, you feel that you are right there, right in it. You empathise not with ‘the author’ or ‘a narrator’ …but with yourself. What makes Katie Hall’s poetry lie so close to our own struggles and doubts are their way of spinning around the swirl formed by the eternal dilemma between needing and resisting, between shame and desire. Ultimately, between honesty and pretence. To be read one by one, reflected upon, and then re-read. If you are up to it. ‘Cause you will discover sides of yourself that you had forgotten about or stowed away. Now, with Katie Hall, it is time to find it back.

Powerful scribblings

Some of my favorite Katie Hall poems from her recently released debut collection, Scribbling.

Rules
I am tired of rules!!!
Rules on how to behave,
rules on why to behave,
and when to behave.
Rules on how to think
and even not.
Rules on how to kill my time
because pleasure is a commodity I can't afford.
Rules on how to love,
and how to not,
Rules on who to love,
and who to not...
Constrictions anywhere and everywhere
I turn my look around,
hoping to see at least a face
that doesn't say: NO or Not, or Don't,
but Yes, and Go and Do...
But my look encounters no expression
of making me want to let go of me,
out of these chains of morality.
So I look down, with a grey look
and a torn heart, and a burning tear
for being so misunderstood...

Trinity
(extract)
I wonder what happens to those who meditate and search for the illumination. They empty their minds into the point of filling Mind with... I wonder what can fill a Mind other than thoughts, free and oppressed, open and suppressed, optimistic or pessimistic... And how can you fill an already filled cup or empty an always filling one when you stand under the source and your cup never gets reversed? Which is the appearance of Illumination? It means lighting, bring light forth, take light in, but I wonder whether Light needs emptiness or presence to shine upon.

Hanging...
I haven't seen myself in the mirror lately,
You saying that I am Beautiful, was enough.
I haven't used the comb for my hair,
thinking the glide of your fingers through them,
would give me the style I couldn't do myself.
I forgot to think about me,
because all I can think of, is us.
I left my body untouched,
waiting for a touch of yours...
I have left so many things undone,
so many words untold,
so many thoughts enclosed,
Waiting for the day...

Perseverance
Stay under the rain of my emotions
and feel them as they fall down on you,
in a frenzy of winter cold
to warm you up
as you hold on to your own world
filled with insecurities and quests,
passions and regrets.
Are you really so restless?
Are you really so empty as to not see
the horizons opening  in front of you?
Stay under my rain of emotions,
don't take shelter or hide, just let go,
and feel your deliverance as it comes...

Back Up

If you’re down
On the ground
Then get up
If not on your feet
At first
Then at least
On your knees
Soon it will hurt
So you can choose
To get down again
On the ground
Or get up
Further up
On your feet
And stand.
Too tired
To choose?
Then follow
My command:
Stand!

©2012 Bjørn Clasen

Chosen feelings are not actually feelings

‘Feelings are the one thing you cannot choose. Otherwise you wouldn’t feel them. They can seem wrong or confusing or even frustrating or devastating, but they are there. If we could just choose them, we wouldn’t have many problems in life, at least not significant ones. What we can choose is how to approach what we do feel. Even this is often tough work, and the first, biggest and maybe most important and for some reason difficult step is to acknowledge a feeling.’

Bjørn Clasen
3 January 2012

Half A Genius

I’m half a genius
Or a half genius
Not sure
Maybe I’m no genius
At all
‘Cause it’s one of these
Things
That on Earth is
Either-or
If you’re not unquestionably
A genius
You’re not a genius
At all
Except of course those
About whom people discuss
Whether they are genius
Or just plain mad
But I’m not mad
So maybe I’m just plain

© Bjørn Clasen

Un faux chemin vers le mauvais but

« Le rêve d’indépendance financière est toujours très répandu dans les pays industrialisés. Voilà pourquoi nous nous échinons toute la journée et passons le plus clair de notre temps à travailler, alors que la plupart d’entre nous n’arriveront jamais à être vraiment « libres ». L’argent et le prestige occupent les deux plus hautes marches de notre système personnel de valeurs, avant même la famille et les amis. C’est d’autant plus étonnant que l’échelle de valeurs des économistes du bonheur est exactement l’inverse. Selon cette évaluation, il n’y a rien qui rende plus heureux que les relations interpersonnelles, c’est-à-dire les échanges avec sa famille, son ou sa partenaire, ses enfants et ses amis. En deuxième position vient le sentiment d’être utile ; puis, selon les circonstances, arrivent la santé et la liberté. Si l’on se fie donc à cette échelle de valeurs, on peut dire que la plupart des gens des pays riches se trompent en accordant autant d’importance à l’argent : ils ne font que prendre de mauvaises décisions. Ils cherchent à atteindre une sécurité qu’ils n’auront sans doute jamais. Ils sacrifient leur liberté et leur autonomie pour un salaire toujours plus élevé. Et ils achètent des choses dont ils n’ont pas besoin pour impressionner des gens qu’ils n’aiment pas avec de l’argent qu’ils n’ont pas. »

Richard David Precht
Dans l’essai « Vanuatu — les îles de la félicité. Qu’est-ce qu’une vie heureuse ? »

For et tæt nordisk samarbejde

»Frimandsætter, ranke, høje,
Sol og Blæst i Haar,
Kraft i Haand og Lys i Øje,
fylker Nordens Gaard«

Kaj Munk
“Saml Dig, Nord!” — Nationaltidende 10. juli 1938

Når inspirationen lever

»Jeg er stolt og meget glad for at “Kald det kærlighed” stadig er så livskraftig, som den er.
Jeg vil ydmygt sige tusind tak til inspirationen: Hun åndede på mig den nat i 1985, hvor sangen kom til sig selv. Før blækket var tørt var “Kald det kærlighed” kravlet ned af køkkenbordet og ud af kattelemmen i bagdøren. Først langt senere opdagede jeg, at den var forsvundet ud i natten for at leve sit helt eget liv i Danmark.«

Lars Lilholt
KODA Nyt 2008

Happiness

‘[T]here is no happiness like that of being loved by your fellow-creatures,
and feeling that your presence is an addition to their comfort.’
Charlotte Brontë
in ‘Jane Eyre’ (chapter 22)

The Trend Of Encouraging Overeducation

‘Even top-tier MBA degrees often say more about the desire to have an important credential
than about any greater capacity to be a good leader or manager.’
Michael Schrage
in ‘Higher Education Is Overrated; Skills Aren't’
on Harvard Business Review

What Is Love?

It is about giving or at least wanting to give. Most can agree on that. And after that? Hoping to receive? Wanting to receive? Expecting to receive? Demanding to receive? This discussion is about just that.

It started when I posted a comment on the article ‘Neva A. Lockhart on why Unconditional Love is a Lie’. Ms Lockhart then wrote back to me:

‘To know what love looks and feel like one would have to have all or most of their expectations met. This gives a person the ability to identify for themselves what their true love is. It is unrealistic, and unreasonable to think that True Love has no expectations, when we love we expect to be loved in return, even our pets expect a loving pat on the head, should we as humans expect anything less?’

My thoughts on the matter are that I don't disagree with either of Ms Lockhart or Saint-Exupéry, or rather I don't fully agree with either of them.

I do not believe that, in loving, one expects something in return. One hopes for something in return. And one's readiness to love can be badly shaken if love is unrequited.

That, in turn, leads to shielding oneself against love without expectations …the question is then whether love with expectations, as opposed to love with 'just' the hope that is a part of the feeling of love almost by definition, is actually really love or more like admiration, affection, or perhaps affiliation.

Love is a feeling, it is not something you can create or destroy in yourself. As with all emotions, you either feel it or you don't. That is the purity of love. And in that respect, I believe that talking about 'unrealistic' and 'unreasonable' is imposing something on love that it cannot be fit into: sense (in the meaning of 'reason').

Love very often is not sensible, does not make any sense. Even when it does, it is not sense that has caused the feeling to be born or to persist. Likewise, it is not sense that makes the feeling of love disappear.

So when we love, we give. When we give, we hope for something to return. Some call it 'invest'. Unlike other kinds of investment, we do not expect anything in return. We hope, though it is not the hope that drives us, that drives the feeling. The feeling is just …there.

Bjørn Clasen

The Freedom To Be Free — La liberté d'être libre

‘Freedom has become a duty, not just a possibility.
But by becoming a constraint, it empties itself from its sense!’
Michela Marzano, philosopher
in Psychologies #292 (January 2010) — «Pourquoi nous hésitons?» (‘Why do we hesitate?’)
by Valérie Peronnet
quotation translated by Bjørn Clasen

« La liberté est devenue un devoir, pas seulement une possibilité.
Mais en devenant une contrainte, elle se vide de son sens! »
Michela Marzano, philosopher
in Psychologies Nº 292 (janvier) — «Pourquoi nous hésitons?» par Valérie Peronnet

Ton intégrité est à toi — Your integrity is your own

»Je devrais me priver de faire ce dont j'ai envie, juste parce que ce n'est pas ce que l'on attend de moi? Me l'interdire serait aller à l'encontre de mes convictions.«
Sophie Cadalen — auteure, actrice et psychanalyste
dans Psychologies Nº292 — Janvier 2010
*****
‘I should deny myself what I feel like doing, just because it is not what is expected of me? To forbid myself from it would be to go against my conviction.’
Sophie Cadalen — author, actress and psychoanalyst
in Psychologies #292 — January 2010

Perfect Moments in real life and in fake non-fiction

‘The trouble with Perfect Moments is that they never come at the end of the trip. They come somewhere in the middle. Or the beginning. As a travel writer, you get to cheat. Rearrange chronology. Take your Day Two dinner with the college kids and turn it into the last paragraph, your final hurrah. It’s fake, of course, but so is a lot of travel writing, so what’s the difference?

Actual travelers don’t have this luxury. Actual travelers exist in real time and have to deal with the kinds of troubles that don’t end up as body copy between splashy photos of a beach at dawn and coconut-encrusted prawns in honey-melon-okra dipping sauce at cocktail hour. Actual travelers have to deal with actual travel. Often, this leads to the kind of trouble the travel industry would just as soon pretend doesn’t exist.’

Chuck Thompson
in ‘Smile When You’re Lying — Confessions Of A Rogue Travel Writer’ (p 23)

Review of the book

Was eine Mannschaft ist — What a team is

„Mannschaft bedeutet für mich einen Verbund von Personen, die in bestimmten Aktivitäten als Einheit auftreten und geschlossen gemeinsame Ziele verfolgen. Jeder muss seine individuellen Stärken der Mannschaft zur Verfügung stellen.”

„Eine Mannschaft sind Personen, die gemeinsam ein Ziel vor Augen haben und es gemeinsam erreichen und teilen wollen.”

Spieler-Zitate
im GeißbockEcho — das Clubmagazin des 1. FC Köln, Nr. 9 vom 20. Dezember 2009

***
‘To me, a Team means a co-operation of individuals who engage in certain activities as a unity, determined to follow common goals. Everyone must put his individual strengths at the team's disposal.’

‘A team is a group of persons who focus on a common goal and who want to reach it together and share it.’

Quotations from players
in GeißbockEcho — 1. FC Cologne's club magazine, #9 of 20 December 2009